Each year as Mother's Day approaches, I think back to my early days in AA.
I was 35, didn't have a pot to pee in, or a window to throw it out of.
My mother was 70 and had a house with several pots & windows, and since I was sober she allowed me to live there with her.
So there we were, just the two of us: I was newly sober, and she had just retired.
What a Great first year of sobriety that turned out to be!
Every day I went to work, came home, and took a brief nap and quick shower while she got dinner ready for us. We ate and talked. and talked. and talked until an AA fellow or two would come by to pick me up to take me to a meeting. This was the routine every day for the year or so that we lived together. She would often invite some of my new friends to come for supper. She also got very proficient at taking detailed phone messages from scores of AA's who would call.
During that time I also got to know her as a person, not just my mother. Adult to adult. What a blessing that was for me.
Eventually I got back on my own two feet and got a place of my own, and my mother moved to a new town with lots of retirees in the neighborhood.
Two years later, my older brother (who had always been a very heavy drinker) died of stomach cancer at age 41. I remember standing at my mother's side at the wake and being glad that I was able to be there to help her through the sad occasion. I was only able to do that because I was sober. I shudder to think where I would have been otherwise.
I also remember that as the many AA's came to give their condolences, she would greet each one of them with a smile on her face, and bright eyes, and remembering many of their names, would say things like; "thank you for helping my boy", "I remember how much you helped my son", or "I pray for you guys every day". All this while grieving the loss of her first son!
My mom passed away ten years ago after what she described as a long and happy life.
When I think of these things, I'm not sure whether the lump in my throat is because I know I had a great mom, or because I am grateful for the joy that Alcoholics Anonymous brought into her life, or I'm grateful for what AA has done for all aspects of my life. Probably all of the above.
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2 comments:
What a perfect Mother's Day tribute!
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